The test

Yes I know everyone's sick of these, but I like this one, so there.

If you've spoken to me about my training for Run To The Beat and the Royal Parks Half Marathon, you'll know that I haven't been loving it. When I signed up for these races I was still on my post-Paris high, and inspired by watching the London Marathon (which I also signed up for, but let's not talk about that right now). This time round, training has felt like a massive chore. Maybe it's because I was missing the camaraderie of Team Bangs, or because it's the first time I'd trained through summer, or maybe I just wasn't ready to train again. I expect it's a combination of all three, and along the way, I totally fell out of love with running. I still had that awesome feeling when I got back from a run, but it was soon replaced by a sense of dread as I thought about the next one I had to do, and I just wanted it all to be over.

I wasn't excited about the races. I've been bleated and whined 'But I don't waaaant to!' to anyone who was kind enough to ask me how training was going. And I meant it. I did. Not. Want. To. If I could, I would have gone back to my May self and stopped her signing up.

But then...

Tuesday. Run Dem Crew. My favourite night of the week. A short and sweet taper run for those of us doing Run To The Beat. Two miles in, I felt a sharp pain in my knee, but I ran through it. Turns out that was not a wise move - on Wednesday, I was in agony. It hurt to walk, especially down stairs. But here's the important part - instead of congratulating myself on my injury and rushing to Twitter to declare I'd have to pull out of RTTB, I was gutted. I mean, I know I'd been complaining about running, but I didn't not want the option, y'know? So I sulked, and didn't tell Twitter that I'd have to pull out because I was clinging on to the hope that I'd wake up the next day and my knee would be fine, and I'd be able to race.

So when I woke up this morning to discover the worst of the pain had gone, I decided it was time for an attitude overhaul (just in time, with three days to go before RTTB). No more moaning, no more hating - I've trained for these runs *ahem*, I want to run them and I want to run them well. And that's what I'm going to do. So thank you, Running Gods, for the test.